How laundry changed my spiritual path

by Arielle Ashford
October 29, 2024

I have never been a “tidy” person, I was not raised knowing how to clean. While we had chores and much to my mothers dismay I would either do it so poorly she would have to do it again, or not do it at all. I was a mess inside my head and my body, cleaning was a reflection of how the mess inside needed to be addressed, and it terrified me. I did not know where to start or even how to articulate the emotional pain that was festering and growing within myself. Running parallel at this time were karmic ripening and my spiritual gifts becoming more apparent and not allowing me to ignore them. So I did what any normal teen would do, I turned to the sex, drugs, and rock n roll lifestyle. Live fast and hopefully die young, more on that in another post! 

I noticed a trend in myself as I grew older. When my space and my car was clean, I was doing ok! From the inside out. When my space and my car were not clean, well there was something different going on inside. The outside became a reflection of the inside. Then entered the fancy clothes, makeup and hair to paint a better picture for those looking in from the outside. It was all a mask for the upheaval happening in my mind. But this mask is something that the world values a lot. So the masks stayed on, and I plunged on in my western talk therapy hoping to tidy up the knot of emotions, tangled inside. 

Today we lead busy lives. The well intentioned pile of laundry to be cleaned or folded grows and grows on the chair. The dishes pile up, and not to mention the mess in the basement. How easy is it to just bury our heads in the sand, we become blind to it, we do not even see it. It is just there, the heap in the corner begging for our attention until enough is enough and we begin to comb through the mess on the chair, or in the basement, or maybe the mess in the head and body. Some of us are lucky to have friends, family, or a mentor who will act as that mirror, calling loving  attention to the aspects of ourselves that we rather not deal with. You bet it’s painful. There is always a choice though, we can continue to ignore and let that pile keep on piling or we can choose to embrace the mess we have made and work our way through, folding, and neatly putting back the clothes of our lives. Who knows, you may even find items to discard along the way. Things that no longer fit, or serve us.

 Working through the pile of laundry, I notice old items I have hung on to, the emotions, the memories, the nostalgia of that particular moment. Can I use my mindfulness skills and hold on to the memory to appreciate that moment in time, but also look to the future. The memory I will always have, the item is just taking up space and energy that needs to be put to other items in the pile. So I neatly fold the clothes, taking one last look, and place it in the donation bag, thanking myself and the memory.  

There are things that are ready to be let go of, there are things that I am not willing to let go of at this moment, maybe someday that will change. Maybe that day will never come. Wow, who knew what could be discovered in this simple chore that was embraced! 

As I move through the house, and yes the studios, folding the laundry that is all around, I notice the feelings in my body as these items are put away properly or discarded. Cleaning out the old to make way for the new. I wonder what else will be discovered on this journey?